(with apologies to Billy Joel)
At the Boston Marathon, someone set us up the bomb
Backpack tax attacks, at least that's what they say
Talking heads smelling Tea, live on MSNBC
New York Times solving crimes, suspects the NRA
Journalist, media, Google Wikipedia
Experts, head hurts, CNN's a wreck
In their guts, they see nuts, homegrown Boston Patriots
APB for Tom Brady, hunt for Belichek
This was a one week cycle
It started Monday
And drug on to Sunday
This was a one week cycle
No I didn't need it
But I tried to tweet it
Gosnell trial, victim pile, coverage in a little while
News vans, spray-on tans, updates overnight
Michael Moore connects the dots, Alex Jones detects the plots
Blogger dope holds out hope the perpetrator's white
Hot mess PBS sanity under stress
Mississippi senator gets something in the post
Slicin', dicin', envelope of ricin
Perry White Daily Planet, Great Caesar's Ghost
This was a one week cycle
It started Monday
And drug on to Sunday
This was a one week cycle
No I didn't need it
But I tried to tweet it
What was that? Something loud, in Texas there's a mushroom cloud
Gun check vote wreck, Obama hissy fit
Minnesota snowstorm, kegger at the bomber's dorm
Labor force getting worse, economy is shit
Oh noes, photos, big nose frat bros,
Asia shakes, China quakes, nature on a bender
Ricin perpetrator is an Elvis imitator
He wrote, I quote, Return to Sender
This was a one week cycle
It started Monday
And drug on to Sunday
This was a one week cycle
No I didn't need it
But I tried to tweet it
Shootout with a highjacked cahh, pahked across from Hahvad Yahd
In a twist, with COEXIST upon its bumper sticker
One down, one to go, sleeper cell rodeo
Number two might be Hindu, the plot is getting thicker
Terrorist on the loose, the Chechens have come home to roost
Inconvenient time to be for immigration amnesty
Beantown lockdown, Euro's in a meltdown
Meanwhile in Watertown the whole thing is going down
This was a one week cycle
It started Monday
And drug on to Sunday
This was a one week cycle
No I didn't need it
But I tried to tweet it
North Korea rattles sabers, reporters interview the neighbors
Mommy says the boys were good, perhaps a bit misunderstood
Dzhokhar, Smoker, Midnight Toker
Apprehended by police, FBI chases geese
First reports turned out wrong, nothing more here, move along
It's very rude to conclude what has turned out to be true
What is this shit? Looks like I picked
A bad week to quit sniffing glue
This was a one week cycle
It started Monday
And drug on to Sunday
This was a one week cycle
No I didn't need it
But I tried to tweet it
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